Oh Gustav were are you?

John's parent's made it in safe this afternoon. We were all so happy to see them. However, you can tell we are all Yankee's. They decided they wanted to see the Gulf so we were planning a trip down there tomorrow. Um, forgot about the hurricane! We got home and had a note on our door from housing saying we need to prepare for it as it will hit southern LA and AL on Monday! Looks like it wont be a direct hit, but will will get plenty of rain and winds. I am thinking maybe going to Florida tomorrow isn't the smartest idea and maybe Wal-Mart is. At least we have the gas range in this house. From www.weather.com "the outer rainbands of Gustav will begin impacting coastal areas of Louisiana, Mississippi, Alabama and the Florida Panhandle as early as late Sunday with scattered downpours and thunderstorms. Wind, rain and waves will increase significantly through Monday with the worst conditions arriving along the Louisiana coast by Monday afternoon."  HMM, sort of getting worried. More worried about getting things at Wal-Mart and especially worried about the 6 boxes of toasted ravioli in my freezer! I am also worried about not being able to turn in assignments for class. I guess since my laptop is fully charged I still write them, but cant turn them in. I emailed my teacher but already I can tell that doesnt work too well.

Otherwise we are doing fine. We went to Dothan tonight for dinner to celebrate John's moms birthday. A waitress gave Cade a kiddie cup with ice in it to "make noise". He was so excited when she gave him the cup that he took and and tried for at least 5 minutes to drink from it. So I took the lid off the help him drink it and accidentally poured it all over him! WOOPS mommy. We went to the book store, well because we all enjoy it! John's parents are here until Thursday, but I am a little worried about them being here and then getting home. Hopefully by then the weather will have died down, but we will probably be spending most of our time at home. I was looking forward to getting out and exploring the town a bit since I have a reason. Normally it is just Wal-Mart for us!

I have also included a few pictures of Cade taking a bath in the big boy tub. He loves it! He spends about 30 minutes a night in there playing around. 

Its that time of the year again...

As you will see I have added a "wish list" list. This is for any idea's you might need for Christmas or other occasions. Here is also a list of local places, so you know what we do have down here.

Stores:

Wal-Mart (www.walmart.com

Target (www.target.com, we also have a wish list here)

Kohl's (www.kohls.com)

Bed, Bath and Beyond (Bad, Bad and Badder)

Best Buy (www.bestbuy.com

Dick's

Michael's (www.michaels.com)

the "mall" (www.shopwiregrasscommonsmall.com)

Blockbusters

Home Depot

Lowe's

Game Stop

Old Navy

Pier One

Barnes and Noble

Places we eat at:

Chili's

Applebee's

Rodeo (local Enterprise restaurant)

Myior's (local Enterprise restaurant)

Waffle House

Outback

Sonic

Quizno's sub

Taco Bell

McDonald's

Burger King

extras:

itunes g.c.

red vines (at walgreens candy for John)

twizzlers (kelly)

skittles (john)

twix (kelly)

kitkat (john)

dark chocolate (kelly)

milk chocolate (john)

crunch bars (kelly)

Wonka bars (Kelly)

I think that about covers it. Nothing else much going on. We went out for dinner tonight with friends, which was GREAT! One has a kid who is three months and the other was blind Kelly and her husband, John (I know, funny!). We had such a good time at...Ryan's (we will never get away from that place). We had to leave first though, which was hard because we wanted to stay, but Cade was so tired. He was so tried he feel asleep on the changing table! 

My paper is starting to come along very well with some help from Rhonda (THANK YOU!). So I am pleased with it and hoping to get it done because John's parents come in Saturday and it is due saturday night. John surprisingly is off tomorrow. Neither of us knew, so we will be cleaning and I will be working on my paper.

Ugg

So I am still trying to write my first paper. And having ISSUES! It should be so simple. I always over look things and make them harder than they appear. But this time its like so simple. McLuhan's cool and hot theory. He says that "the medium is more important than the textual message". So in theory he is saying that the television is more important than the story it runs. however, he goes on to state that the medium is the message. I take from this that without the medium there would be no message. Which I totally disagree with. Good thing part of my paper is based on my opinion. But I am afraid to tell my opinion because I am not sure I am right with my interpretation! UGGG!

( Anyways on another lighter note. I downloaded Skype (www.skype.com). So now we are able to do live video chats with other people who have the service for free. Right now we are able to talk to Becky. It is really cool. There is definitely a delay with her being so far away. So I am hoping that it will work better with someone in the states. My username is flyboywife. So if you decide to download it, you can search for me that way. I would love to be able to show Cade off to you all in live time!

First Day of School

for me...

So far it is going ok. I am sort of disappointed, but I think I understand why now. At first it seemed that everything is so low key. Like everything is so elementary. I wanted a class that I would learn new things, things other than what I learned in undergrad. I started reading our assignments and it is the exact same things I did in undergrad. However, I say I am understanding because I am starting on my first paper that is due on Saturday! Nothing like an expedite class. It is hard because my mind is so foggy. Like it dying by not being challenged. So it is a bit hard right now trying to read and comprehend the readings and writing a paper on it. Slowly but surely I am getting there. I just hate the first assignment of any class, you never know what the teacher is expecting from you because they don't give complete directions. 

Everyone else is doing fine. Cade was a bit crabby today. We think he is teething again. I will be glad when these two top teeth come in finally. 

We are trying him on a sippy cup. He can already drink from a cup and a bottle. So we feel it is time, but he is having a hard time with it. We tried the Advent cups we had but he just chews on the nipple because it is hard plastic. He likes the Nuby ones from wal-mart because they have a silicon nipple, more like a bottle. He does rather well with it. He can hold his own bottle if you lay him in your lap or on the floor. He wont get the gravity effect until a few more months, when he realizes he has to lean back to get the cup in the air. We are also working on self-feeding. But that isn't going well. He hasn't got the pincher grasp down at all. So he just slaps the table in hopes of getting it into his hand. He did it a few times while on vacation. But still not great at it. Tomorrow I will be calling Parents as Teacher to set something up with them. I tried emailing them today and the email was sent back. But I was able to get a hold of her phone number. I am hoping she will also have some suggestions of play groups or other programs for "us" to attend. 

Home Sweet Home

We finally made it to the end of our trip.

We got up at 0400! And headed out to the airport. Cade slept on both flights and was really good. We are sooo tired though. Its hard because I want to go to bed so bad, but I know John wants to spend time with us. 

It was great to see him. Right as we got off the elevator at Birmingham he was right there! It was great. I just wanted to hug him and not let go. But I had Cade in my arms and thrusted him at John. Cade didn't really know what to do. He just stared at John for a while and then he started to whine and reach for me. I could see John was upset, but I was his constant for two + weeks. So it will just be a short adjustment period. Cade finally warmed up to John though. But not totally. the video sort of shows it. Sorry I was laughing, but it was so funny. Cade used to crack up about it and now... not so much. (here is the link. blogger still isnt working for videos. let me know if this doesnt work. http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=4740153619457378263 )

After we left the airport we decided to drive to Montgomery where we stopped for lunch at Buffalo Wild Wings and we find the nice part of Montgomery! So next time we find a good weekend, we are going to go up there and find some things to see up there.

And Fay is a Bitch! Luckily it was not so bad that we couldn't go home, but she didn't make it easy for us either. Right now it isn't raining, but the radar shows around 10PM we should get another blast http://www.weather.com/weather/map/interactive/36362?from=36hr_topnav_undeclared). It is suppose to rain the rest of the week every day. Yea oh fun.

Virginia - Day 15

Long day today. We got up at 0830. We left and got there around 1030, it opened at 1030, so we got a great parking spot and were one of the first in. 

There were no waits at all! The most we waited was like 10 minutes for a ride. Otherwise we would just walk up and get in empty lines. It was great. We road all of them but one, Huerler. And I didn't ride Flight of Fear. You are at a stand still and then it shots you out going over 60 MPH. No was was I doing that. They also had one like the one in St. Louis (Superman). Where it takes you X amount of feet into the air and just drops you. I did that one with Brandon when we went a few years back. No way in hell was I doing that again. I hate that feeling of weightlessness. Which is why I was a little worried about a few of the rides. Funny how when you are young, nothing seems to bother you. The rush of adrenaline of riding all the rides overpowered your fear of coasters. Then when you get older, you are overcome by the worries of everyday life that coincide with the fear of coasters. I would watch younger kids (like 14) and see how happy they were, with no thoughts of everyday life. They were just living for the moment. Wish I could find that happiness. Here are all the rides we did:

Dominator

Volcano

Grizzly

Rebel Yell

Anaconda

Back Lot Stunt Coaster

Shockwave (You stand up for this one!)

White Water Canyon (like Thunder River)

Avalanche

Log Flume

We had so much fun though. We had dippn' dots and lunch there. I screamed on every ride! It was crazy. The first two we went on were freaky! Volcano you start by going really slow and then they shot you up straight out the volcano at like 60 MPH. Then the rest of the ride you are high flying over everything. Just crazy. 

So tired though. We left around 1500 and got home. We all took showers and I got to see Cade. He was really good in the morning. But after he got up from his afternoon nap, he was crabby. All he wanted was me. Sniff, Sniff. He was fine after I got home. Lastly we all went out to Five Guys (www.fiveguys.com) Burgers. It was great! The burgers sort of taste like Sonic's but they were bigger and you could get a ton of crap on them. Not to mention the fries were great, just like Penn Station fries. 

Virginia - Day 14

Today was a nice day. Mom watched Cade while I went to Once Upon a Child, the food store, and got my nails done. Only a manicure. I love getting them done. Just never do anything for myself. I got the rest of the clothes that I wanted for Cade. I am sure I will have to buy a few more later, but I got enough to last us for some time. 

The Martin's came up this afternoon. We are going to Kings Dominion tomorrow. Then Friday Cade and I are going back with them so they can take us to the airport at ass early Saturday morning. We can't wait to see John, but sad to leave here. I got such a nice tan! 

virginia - Day 13

Did a lot of shopping today (Aren't you happy John?!). Got more clothes for Cade and will be shipping a huge box home. It is cheaper here since we can shop at Once Upon a Child. I still have to go back tomorrow and return a few things and look for some things in bigger sizes I forgot to look at before.

Cade, Mom and I went to lunch at Chili's. We love that place. Cade was a mess there. We gave him a bitter biscuit and he sure loves those! Keeps him quite the entire time, but he is so messy afterwards, he basically needs a bath. 

He is getting so big. Last week he started pulling himself up on things, now he pulls him self up on everything he can, and he is starting to walk while holding onto things. John will freak out when he sees all the things he does. It is crazy trying to keep him in one spot. I am so glad we bought the kiddie pen now.

Aunt Sharil, Joe, Uncle Bob and a friend of Joe's will be coming up tomorrow to spend the rest of the week here. As long as Fay doesn't get too testy Aunt Sharil, Joe, Joe's friend and I will be going to Kings Dominion on Thursday. We will all then go back to VA Beach Friday and get ready for our flight, which leaves at 0600! It was either that time or get in at 2100 and have to get a hotel room. 

We miss John so much. And I know that John misses us. I called him last night to talk to him. The phone picked up and then all I heard was a kid screaming, then the phone call ended. I tried calling John back a few more times and I couldn't reach him. Finally I got threw and he said that he didn't know I even called the first time. His standard answer for not wanting to answer it. I asked him where he was and he said he went and adopted a family! He walked over to one of our friends house to spend time with them and play with their kid. They have a 4 year old named Kain. He is a really great kid, smart and nice. But not so not a kid, know what I mean? He is still goofy. Just like John. Made me sad to know that John was that lonely that he had to go "borrow" a kid to play with! 

virginia - Day 12

Today we drove back from the beach to Richmond. It is a pretty easy drive, about two hours. Luckily Cade slept the entire way.

He went to bed last night at about 2200. Then decided it was a great idea to wake up before the sun was even up. I have no clue what time that was because I wasn't so inclined to get out of bed to get him up. He just whined off and on for awhile and I finally got him up at 0700. He was up until about 0830 when Cade, Aunt Sharil and I went back to bed for about an hour. Then everyone got up. But not for long. He went back to sleep at 1130. 

Aunt Sharil and every one was so great while we were there. They watched Cade for me while I did a few personal things and while I got to spend some time alone in the pool and laying in the sun reading and getting a tan! It was awesome. The food was so good. I loved being able to spend time with them. And even Joe seemed to like Cade, just a little, even though he probably wont admit it. But we did catch him smiling at him and making a few funny faces at Cade. And Joe was kind enough to watch him a few times while I was outside and Aunt Sharil was busy too. It is so nice to have help like that. I am spoiled here and going to hit realization hard when I get back.

But it was good to see mom and Troy again. And I know they were soo happy to see him too. I just hope he sleeps through the night. We share a room here and with the way he has been up and down, I foresee sleeping on the couch tonight.

Also, I changed how many posts are seen on a page. So if you feel you have missed a post go to the sidebar and find it in the archives. With all the pictures from vacation, the page was getting too long and messy to read!

We miss you Daddy!

Virginia - Day 11

Today was a nice day. I spent most of it in the pool, either with Cade and Aunt Sharil or reading a book. I forgot what joy I get from reading. I love to read, but feel guilty when I do because I am not spending time with Cade or John. The only time I have to read when Cade is asleep is at night, but then that is the only time I get to spend with John. I wish I could just find some me time sometimes. I am realizing I am forgetting things that I like to do, and I feel that isn't fair either. You shouldn't forget who you are just because you have a family. So some things are going to have to change when I get home. 

Cade has still been acting odd. Just out of sorts. I am still not sure what is going on with him. I have given him Tylenol a few times today and it seems to help, but then again it doesn't at times. I think he is just ready to be back to his normal routine, with his toys and bed. I think he really misses his daddy a lot too.

Virginia - Day 10

Today was a long day for everyone. Cade in particular. We, I say we, I mean he, got up at 7 and was OK until about 0815. He was so crabby and tired. We decided earlier this week to go today to get his pictures taken. I feel horriable as a mother that we never took him before to get them done. And I wanted some when he was still small before he turns 1. So I laid him back down for about 45 minutes thinking maybe that would put him in a better mood. And I was wrong. He slept all night, never woke up and didnt even take a bottle last night before bed. So I got him up at 0915 to eat breakfast and go to the mall. We had made a appointment at Sears to get them done. We had been there before and were satisfied with our service. However, not today. Cade was tired and crabby. His eyes were red and he just did not want to do much of anything.

We get to Sears early hoping we could get in early. At first this hag of a woman said no. They had two appointments at 1030 and ours was at 1045 and they only had two photographers. But then all a sudden she threw us into a room. So we were happpy to get this shindig going. However, it was not good at all. We said we wanted a "light" colored background because he had a dark blue shirt on. So she gave us a white background. Her camera was on a stick, not a tripod, some sort of stick and she couldnt take it off. Well when you are dealing with a child that is 8 months old and doesnt walk, the distance from him to the camera was pretty high. So all her shots of him were from a distance. I dont care if you have a zoom. You are suppose to work for your client. Then she just tried to hurry. Kept making me set him, and set him and set him, and he did not want that. He wanted to move around and crawl. There was nothing to keep his attention and my aunt and I were trying our hardest to make him smile. All he kept doing was bitting his lower lip and wouldnt crack one for anyone. The hag was too slow when he did, so she ended up getting the aftershot of the smile. Finally she said "ok, go out and wait". We both looked at each other and were like, there wasnt one picture we liked. So we asked if we could take a few more. She said no because we only get 15 minutes and there were others waiting. Um, hello?! We are paying for this. Luckily Aunt Sharil stepped in and said we were going somewhere else. It was ridiculous. She was trying to rush through everything and with kids you cant do that. I know when Becky took Jackson he was tired and they told her to come back a little later when he was in a better mood. I assumed that they would be just as accomidating. So we walked down the mall and got them done at the Picture People. And we loved them!

They were great. She got down on the floor with him, gave him blocks to play with and actually got him to smile. He was hamming up the camera. He was so happy with her, and so were we. The only thing I was dissapointed in was that I wanted to join the picture club, but there isnt a single Picture People in AL! I am really starting to hate this state. So we got some great pictures of him. I was so proud of him and I just love the pictures!

From John...

I miss you two so much I cant wait to have you both home and hug you both. I LOVE YOU both so much and I'll be waiting for you when you arrive next weekend

Virginia - Day 9

Today we went parasailing! Aunt Sharil and I did that is. It was great! Makes you think of that porverable list of "things I want to do before I die". Guess I can mark that one off. We went up over the ocean in front of the boardwalk. It was really amazing. We went 1000 feet up and 500 feet out. It was so quite up there. If you looked straight ahead all you could hear was the wind passing over your ears, but if you turned your head to the side, it was quite. You could barely hear the engine of the boat. And the deck hand was pretty good looking too (now don't you wish you would have answered your phone tonight John?!) It was just purely amazing. I can't describe it any other way.

I started thinking about all the other things I want to accomplish before I pass. Guess now is as good as time as any to start making this list.

1. Parasailing (check)
2. See all 50 states
3. Have kids (check)
4. Become a published author
5. Get a master's degree

Guess I have some more thinking to do. Anyways, Cade stayed at home with Uncle Bob and Joey. They said he had a crying fit, but think it was because he wanted me. Go figure, now he is enter that stage of "wheres mommy". Otherwise he was great. Tomorrow we are going to get his picture taken at Sears. I kept planning on doing it when he was six months then a year, but I guess I got lazy and now I regret it. So I am doing it before a year. I know he will change a lot by then, so at least there is a point to chapter his cuteness again.

Hopefully the weather will be nice again as I would really like to get some more sun. Cade just loves it in the pool so I want him to enjoy it as much as possible. And it wears his butt out! We had a nice storm here today in the late afternoon so were unable to enjoy the VA sunshine and the pool. Such a shame. However, we went to dinner and it was really nice and had a great time.

Finished reading another book. I am going to have to start searching for another one to read. I am trying to read all I can, as when I get home John's family is coming up and I wont get as much time to myself as I do here. Everyone is so eager to take care of him and spend time with him. It is hard to let them do that, as I am so accustomed to doing it on my own. I hope to have lightened up a little to let them spend time with him too, but it is hard. Always the mommy.

I do have a few more pictures but will have to wait probably until I get back to Richmond to upload them. So stay tight for a few more days.

Virginia - Day 6

I got my cord today for the camera so I am going to update a few posts with pictures. So make sure you scroll down to take a peak.

We went out to lunch today and to Target and my favorite store and of course I forgot our liquid gold. So we will have to go back in a day or two to get more formula.

Not much else is going on. Cade is very sleep all the time and not eating all that well. He is not too bad, just not his normal routine. He is waking up at 6 ish each morning which is an hour earlier than normal. I thought maybe it was because it is too bright in our room, but there is no telling. I also thought it could be because I think he is teething. He is very whiny too. Which normally he is not. He whines and smiles at the same time. It is very cute!

virginia - Day 5

Today we went to Once Upon a Child and I bought a bunch of clothes for Cade. A light fall jacket, a heavier winter one (but not too heavy), one pair of sweat pants, one pair of navy blue pants, three or four long sleeve tees, and three or four short sleeve (I figure he can wear a jacket over it if we go any where). The most ironic thing happened while we were there. I was looking at the 50 cent sale rack and found a St. Louis Rams long sleeve onesie! Of course I had to get it, and since it was only 50 cents there was no reason not to. 

I did look up the weather for Enterprise. I actually found a website that some of you might be interested in, its the city website : www.cityofenterprise.net

You must go there and take a look around. I found out a few things that John nor I knew about, like the parks they have there. But I think the thing that I laughed at most was the banner at the bottom of the page. I just still dont get the whole honor a bug thing. But whatever floats their boat. 

Coming up this week we have a lot to do. Thursday Cade and I are driving down to VA beach to visit with Aunt Sharil and them. We are going parasailing! Should be a lot of fun. I will be coming back up on Monday. Then on Wednesday Aunt Sharil and Joey are coming up and on Thursday we are going to Kings Dominion (www.kingsdominion.com). Should be a lot of fun. I can't remember the last time John and I went. I just wish he was here to go with us. I hope that some time John, Cade and I can at least go to Six Flags in Atlanta. Probably wont make it though as seeing Cade will only be about two or threeish by the time we leave AL and he really wont be big enough for the rides at all. Atlanta is four hours away too. But I am still determined to go there while living in AL. I am going to make a list one day of all the places I want to visit while I live in this state. Should be interesting to see where we can end up going. At least we can mark Birmingham off our list. 

A Mother's Love

I was writing this last night, in my head, after I went to bed. My brain just couldn't shut off. Of course I was trying to write before that and it seemed to have already fallen asleep. But as I was lying there in my mom's guest room, with my son asleep in his pack and play, this immense feeling rushed over me. I was warm all a sudden and I couldn't help but smile. I was so tried that all I was looking at was the inside of my eye lids and I was smiling. For a second I couldn't recall why I was so happy or the last time I had felt so warm. And I realized it was because of my son. I laid there listening to him breath and move around. 

Now most mothers would find this a natural state, but for me it is not. I was not one of those mother who instantly fell in love with their child. Now looking at the pictures you must wonder why I could not. But that instantaneously feeling I was suppose to experience, less than one minute after birth never came. It came a few months after. But because of all the other stress in my life (like husband going AD in Army, dealing with buyers from hell and moving 6 states away from home) I think it put a hold on that feeling. But last night I really felt it. I was even overwhelmed by it, I wanted to cry. I wanted to go over and pick him up and put him in bed with me, just so I could be near him. I have felt this before after DH got home from Iraq. But never with my son. So I started thinking.

How much can you really love someone? There is no word in any man made dictionary to describe the immense and overwhelming feeling that fills your heart. The realization of loving some one so much is indescribable. It leaves you speechless. But how do you measure love? There is no chart, no tally to keep. No measurable device to keep track of intangible feelings. But I guess herein lies the answer - love is intangible there for there is no way to measure how much you really love a person. All you can do is look at them every moment you have and tell them. Whether it is with your eyes or your lips, tell them so often they will never forget. So often that when they grow old and their memory fades, the words "I love you" in your voice still rings in their ears. That it lulls them to sleep at night knowing they don't remember how to drive anymore, but they remember the feeling they get when they remember those three words.

Virginia - Day 4

Just hung around today. It was nice to have to not do anything. We all took naps this afternoon. Seemed to do us all well. 

We decided to take Cade off stage 3 foods as he did not like ANY of them. He was doing a repeat of the macaroni movie. It was great entertainment, but really did not accomplish anything. We decided to keep breakfast as a stage 3 since he is a breakfast man. He always wakes up so happy in the mornings and he will finish an entire jar. We are switching the rest of the meals back to stage 2. However, I am adding in more food still. I am now mixing two tablespoons of oatmeal with apple juice. He does seem to still be hungry after one jar of food. But wont eat an entire other jar. So I figure this is one way to get him more food and not waste any.

Cade is now able to hold onto someone's fingers and get one leg underneath him and pull himself up with no help. He still isn’t talented enough to hold onto a couch or chair (I am counting my blessings for that one), but it seems soon he will be pulling himself up all by himself.

This afternoon we did take a little drive down to the older section of Richmond. They were trying to show me a certain area of old houses, but there was a watermelon festival going on and all the streets were closed. I was able to see Monument Road, where all the monuments of the civil war generals are. It was nice to see some history. I am really excited about going back to see more homes. They are just enormous and so grand. I think John would really like to see them. I hope I can take some pictures for him. 

i have decided to go to the beach on Thursday. I want to try to spend as much time with my family as possible. I can not wait to go back. Cade loves the pool so much and I enjoy seeing how happy he is when he is in it. My aunt even talked my uncle and my cousin into watching Cade if we want to go to the beach. 

Hopefully tomorrow I will receive my package from John with all the cords in it. I have a few pictures to post. I will probably post them with the posts they go with. So you might have to scroll down a bit to check them out. They are very cute though. I mean why wouldn't they be?!

Also, as you can tell, I am in the middle of updating and changing the way my blog looks. I am just not completely happy with it. So tell me what you think as things change. 

virginia - Day 3

Today was a nice day. We woke up and ate breakfast and afterwards mom, Cade and I went to my favorite store to get a few things. Afterwards we came back, had lunch and took naps. We went out to dinner at a Chinese buffet and after that came home. 

We gave Cade a bath again in the sink. He is so good in it and loves it. John really needs to go to the store and find a bath mat. I looked today and they had some in the baby section at Wal-Mart. 

After Cade went to bed my mom and I went through a box of old stuff. I pulled out a few things I am shipping home. Like old photo graphs, papers from when I was born, those sorts of things. But I did find an interesting picture (which I will post after I get my camera cord) and a very heart spoken letter as follows (it is dated 3/31/83):

To Kelly

Sweet baby,

At the dawn of your life, you have so much to look toward and so far to go. Were I able to do so, I would grant you the best of gifts:

The ability to laugh and cry, whisper and shout.

Look, then understand what you've seen, whether in the world or within yourself.

Listen, whenever possible, for herein lies the road to wisdom.

Enjoy the company of others, yet treasure the solitude of yourself.

Give of yourself, honestly, and thus learn peace.

Live in harmony with others, appreciating without condemnation, the differences you find.

Strive to attain your goals, knowing your limits, yet never without testing those limits and pushing beyond.

Above all, dear child, I wish you love, as perhaps only God loves. Honest, and given freely. To experience such love is to truly know the essence of life. 

The letter is not signed. I really would like to know who sent this letter to me. I wish I had read it long ago. And I hope if you know me know you find that I have started to accomplish all you wanted for me. I wish I had written this letter to my son. Possibly I will pass it on to him and our other children as something to look at and remember when they start to travel down their road of life. 

Virginia - Day 2

Not much else went on today. Just traveling again.

We got up and had a great breakfast at aunt sharil's. Then got ready and headed out to mom's in Richmond. However, we got lost. Not bad. There was a accident on West 64 before the tunnel. Bad thing being surrounded by water. There is only one way out! So we had to turn around and call for directions on another way. It took us about 3.5 hours instead of 2. Cade did pretty good. About the last hour in the car he wasn't happy. Wasn't throwing a fit, but wasn't happy either. He needed to eat lunch and was just so tired. 

We got here though, ate lunch, let Cade crawl around and play for awhile and we both went to bed. I was so tired. Mom finally came in and woke us up for dinner.

He really didn't eat much. We started stage 3 foods, but I guess the flavor is so strong he gags on everything. Even green beans. He did have real mashed potatoes and green beans tonight. Did not like the green beans, but the potatoes were ok. He thought they were ok, not too thrilled. So I think I am going back to stage 2 foods at least until we get back home. He just does better on them. He doesn't even eat the whole jar of stage 3 either. I am going to keep trying him on adult foods since his GI said it was alright. She prefers that he starts that before he has the baby foods anyways. 

So we took a bath in the kitchen sink! He loved it. Had a few things to play with and did great. I think it is time daddy, to take him out of the baby bath and just do his bath in the big tub. There are suction mats in the baby department down the baby wipe isle, I think, that has all the bath stuff. We will need to go there and look for a mat so his little butt doesn't slip and slide along the bottom of the tub. Also means we need to keep the tub clean! 

Virginia - Day 1

We we made it, and all in one piece! Cade did great. I could not have asked for him to behave any better. But I was not expecting him to be horrible in the first place. We woke up Thursday at 5 and got to the airport. I was so nervous going through security because I had all this white powder (formula, baby cereal and his medication) and then water to mix it. So I was telling the security lady all the crap we had, as I was taking it all out and she stopped me and just asked for the laptop. So I pulled that out and that was all. I was excited I did not have to pull all our crap out because I still had to pull Cade out of the stroller and then close that up to put it through. Luckily they let me go in the line where the pilots and flight attendants go, so there was not a lot of people waiting on me. 

We got through security ok, and then I thought that the stroller was broken. It would only go in circles! I tried and tried to push it forward, but the front left wheel kept turning weird. I tried pushing it back into place and I just couldn't. I almost was going to go over to a family and ask the dad to help me, when I realized somehow the brake got set! So I fixed that right away. 

After that we went to our gate and sat down. I was going to get some breakfast when I realized we only had about 20 min before we could board. I realized that we had to walk down stairs, across the tarmac, then up the stairs to the plane. So I went up to the desk and ask for some help since I had the stroller. They said no problem and then assigned me to my own row. 

So I sat down and started to fix his medication. I started to realize that everyone was looking at me mix this powder with this bottle of water that was labeled nursery water. Can you say terrorist? I mean they did search me or anything or take out our formula, just sort of scary. So I got him his medication and since he was so awake at 6 he wanted food. So then I had to feed him that. No biggie, I realized when I was doing it that I was crazy for not planning on doing it. Good thing my kid told me. But I held off on the bottle until the plane. 

Then they came over and said there were taking us down with a man in a wheelchair and his daughter to the elevator and onto the plane way before everyone else. They even had someone push the stroller for me since I was holding Cade at the time. They folded the stroller and set it aside for the gate check and we got on. It was great. They were so nice.

So we got to Cincinnati, walked down the way to our next gate. Again I asked if we could board early and they reassigned us to our own row and got us on 20 min ahead of time. I believe we were the first flights of the day too. He was awake for about half that flight, but so happy. Jumping up and down on my lap and talking away. He feel asleep and was hard to wake up when we landed. 

When we got to Norfolk aunt Sharil was there and picked us up. It was great to see her.  Mom was at her house and just got there. So when we pulled up she came out to meet us. Luckily we got to stay the night at aunt Sharil and did not have to drive to moms (2 hours away) right away. I did not want Cade to have to go through all that traveling in one day.

So instead we went into the pool! Cade's first time. Yes, I have pictures, but I forgot the cord for the camera, which John mailed me and I should get Monday or Tuesday. So I will post them then.

He loved the pool so much. At first he just sort of like, BATH? Now? Outside? But after like 3 minutes he was laughing so hard. He just loved it. He was kicking like crazy. That is all he did was kick and slap the water. We so should have got him into water classes. John wanted to, but we just did not do it. I did check with the "YMCA" about it right before I left, but they classes had already ended. I am going to check on base when I get home as they have an indoor pool. But I mean he just loved it. I had never seen him react to anything like that before. It was great. I just wished John had got to be here to see him too.

In Birmingham there was a governor...

Today and yesterday were very full action packed days. 

Yesterday we got up at 4AM. We arrived in Birmingham on time! YAY for us. We find our way downtown and to the address we were given. So we pull up in front of the building and see that the parking lot is roped off and nobody is inside the building. OK, we are early. We figure we are the first appointment of the day. So we wait a few minutes. So I decide to call my voicemail and listen to the message again we got on Sunday night in reference to this appointment. The first time I listened to it, I couldn't hear it and figured it said what the other calls say, which is to get there 30 minutes early to fill out paperwork. But when I listen to it for the first time with out interference, I realized they mention a different address! So we are 10 minutes until our appointment and now we have book it to the other location. Luckily it was right down the street at the main Children's hospital. So we get there and park and go into. We are lost, again. We cant find the main desk and figure it says our appointment is on the 4th floor. So we get to the forth floor and realize its a patient wing! I feel horrible, as a very sleep depraved dad got back on the elevator with us. Finally we find our way to the right building and right floor and we were the first there. 

We saw the ped eye doctor and he said this:

Cade is far-sighted

He has a astigmatism

He has a clogged tear duct. 

So he says that he will wait until Cade is a year to do the probe if he needs it. But if there is any reason he will need surgery before then, to let him know and he will go ahead and do the probe while Cade is under. So I tell him we are going to the ped ENT today for his ear and it is a possibility. So he says to call him today after and let him know so they can correlate the surgery. 

So after that we are exhausted. We go to the hotel and try to take a nap, all of us. Only that didnt work. Cade decided he was having to much fun crawling around on the floor and didnt want to be confined to his crib. So after listening to him throwing a fit for a hour. John got him up and put him in bed with us. We slept for 40 min. After that we went to dinner at Buffalo Wild Wings! We so miss that.

Then we go back to the hotel and get ready for bed and the next day (today). We do our normal routine for Cade and low and behold, he wont go to bed. We even let him crawl around until 9 and he still threw a fit for an hour and a half. Then he got up at 6. His schedule was so off. 

This morning we got up and packed and decided to go look for a hotel for Cade and me to stay at that had a shuttle and was close to the airport. We did and it is really nice. So we went to lunch and then to Children's South. Another location of Children's Hospital for his last two appointments. We get there, after them calling us and asking us to come in early, they make us wait a hour until our real appointment time. 

So his GI appointment:

He weighs 19lbs

He is doing great

Will be kept on his medication and formula mix until at least a year

Probably allergic to certain dyes (ie. why he gets sick when he eats orange and yellow foods)

He should start people foods (potatoes, bananas, things like that)

Start stage 3 foods

Start oatmeal

So pretty much he is doing great from her point of view and she said we just need to keep dealing with the puking.

So then upstairs to the ENT. Now remember Cade didnt go to bed until 10ish and got up at 6  and still has not had a nap at this point. Luckily they got us in early at the ENT and the waiting room was PACKED! There wasnt anywhere to even sit hardly.

So ENT:

Not the cyst we thought it was classified as

No idea what type of cyst it is

Rare cyst because of location

Needs to be removed 

So the doctor is so normal and like "So next week we can do the surgery". WHAT in the who where now?! Um because that is just a normal thing to say to a parent. So I tell him we are leaving tomorrow and cant, and then we cant when we get home because John's parents are coming in. So right now he is going to have it SEPT 8th. They are calling the eye doctor tomorrow to coordinate the two. So it might change. 

So after that we go back to the new hotel and take everything in. I asked John to make sure the new car seat fits in the car seat bag. I didnt want anything to happen to the $300 investment! He didnt, and it didnt fit! So now I have too much luggage and I dont know how to get it all.  I cant gate check the car seat because I cant lug the diaper bag, the backpack, my purse and the stroller and the car seat while we have a layover. I was suppose to pack the diaper bag and just have the backpack and purse on the plane, but now since I have to pack the car seat bag, I cant pack the diaper bag. Not to mention trying to get the suitcase, car seat and four bags, the stroller and the baby downstairs tomorrow at 530. 

So if I make it to VA with out losing it and stuff, it will be a miracle.

were leaving on a jet plane

In a few days. I am still packing at this point. Well, actually I am writing this while John is reading a book and watching "Finding Nemo" on Disney. You do have to love that movie though. There is so much to pack and in so many different places. I need one bag for the hotel for all three of us, then I need our suitcase for the trip, the diaper bag (which I am thinking about putting in the suitcase), then the car seat bag, my purse and the carryon. We took the dog off to day care so he is there until Thursday. 

We went to John's ENT today. Apparently he has had this hole in his ear drum for a long time, since childhood they said. We just cant believe that no one caught it. John said that MEPS has one of the most thorough exams. The doctor said that it probably just got worse because nobody caught it. We were just thinking of all those times when in the USMC he would have to go into the water, and his swim quals, and now being here. Its just amazing no one else caught it. His doctor said since it is such a chronic condition that he is referring John to Birmingham. Go figure. So he is going to a specialist up there that only deals with ears. He will do the procedure on John to close the hole. Then John will have all his follow ups down here in  Enterprise. So everything turned out ok. He still has to have surgery, but its not a huge deal, outpatient. Two to three weeks recovery, I.E. no swimming sort of thing. Which means no dunker. He wont be able to get the referral into Tricare until Thursday at the earliest. I hope they get things going though. He has a min of two months before his next class. And with how slow they do things around here, I just want this done with because John will still have to go to dunker. That class runs 5 days a week, so we are not worried about him not being able to get in. 

Not much else going on. Finished enrolling today for school. Got my first course and now I have to buy books. I find out in a week or so about FAFSA, but of course we didn't qualify for the pell grant, so it is student loans again. I can get all my student loans in deferment, except the private loan. Which we didn't realize doesn't qualify for deferment status. 

Well I am off to more packing. We are getting up tomorrow at 4am. So guess I will be needing some beauty sleep tonight. 

Finding my self worth

Well today was a big day for me. I enrolled in college to obtain my masters. I enrolled at Ellis University (http://ellis.nyit.edu/schools/masters/advertising.php) in NY. I am going for my Master's in Communication Arts - Advertising and Public Relations Specialization. It is a big step for me. After having things to fulfill your life and then having nothing, the feeling of worthlessness starts to set in. Yes, Cade is a big part of my life, the biggest part of my life, but I had always told John I would never be able to stay home all day. Understanding this he encouraged me to purse what made me feel better about my self and my life. Luckily this college program is online, so I will be able to still be home with Cade while being able to do something for myself. 

Cade is doing good. Still puking all over the floor. They say the older he gets and the more mobile he gets when he starts walking the puking will start being less and less. They say with his severity of reflux it will take longer than the normal year to dissipate. 

As for John, his first week of office rat is finished with. Only five more to go. We did find out that John's ear did not heal. Monday afternoon, late, we will be going with him to an ENT in Entertprise. He is actually going to the partner of Cade's ENT. Probably because they are the only two within two hours of here. They said he will basically have to have surgery, but the ENT will make the final decision. They said it is out patient and nothing. John looked it up online and said they don't do any cuts or any thing. They put like a patch over it and thats it. What made John more made, was that his flight surgeon accused him of using a cotton swab in his ears. John said he didn't and his flight surgeon said that John was lying. Whatever, I have already lost my faith in Army doctors. Three of them said nothing was wrong with Cade, the one I went to didn't speak English (literally, he used sign language), and now John's doctor put a hole in his ear and caused him to have surgery. It almost wants me to go onto Tricare Standard, but then we pay out of pocket, but yet we get to pick our doctors.